K pasa mi gente… wussup… I’m back ‘gain with the word on my super busy weekend (I know it’s been a cliff hanger for you all wonderin’ what I been up to.) Saturday I was in Phillie for UFC 101 which was awesome. Mostly because I don’t really care who wins, I just like to give the ladies somethin’ pretty to look at (my gorgeous unswollen fight free face) during the rounds. I’m generous that way.
The night started by me goin’ to the exclusive TapouT pre-fight party. And of course, the second I walked in the door this chica in a hot flowered dress started giving Rico the eye. I was flattered, don’t get me wrong, but you know, there’s only one of me to go around and I really don’t feel right neglecting all the other ladies just for one. So I flashed her my abs and gave her a personally signed autograph. There were tears in her eyes when I refused to hang, but a guy in my position can’t play favorites.
Moving on to the second half of the night, I headed out to my front row seat to find that my ticket connection had sandwiched me between two cuties. Which was fine, great, terrific, but hey like I said, I gotta remain unattached. So I tried to get rid of them with autographs but unfortunately… one was wearing a stainless steel cuff and wouldn’t take “no” for an answer. She flashed it at me reminding me she had the power to clock me if she wanted. Even worse, the other had a crystal moon pendant (that also happens to be a USB memory key) and hypnotized me! She got me to pose for a bunch of pics with her friend, all while she was clicking away with her little pink camera. So don’t believe ANYTHING you see or read about me in the next few days…
But the night got even weirder. What happened next was…
Oh, dang! My technician is here for my weekly four o’clock appointment to get my chest waxed.
To Be Contd…
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